i don't know what in my head right now, my exam gonna end around in the corner of the week. at last, it's HOLIDAY babe, Wohoo. Do u have ever once realize that actually our heart really easy to be scared of, try to think once, and you will know what i mean. Fear was one of human factor make them scared to make something, and tend to repeat the same mistakes.

In our world, theres a lot of beautiful things that we can see and share. For me, i like to watch a certain scene. Like, the picture of garden, mountain, clear sky, and etc, plus if i watch them and listen to my mp3 it makes my day =D . I'm sure you also have the same interest, but maybe it on your own way. So, let's try to make our earth green. Try to avoid littering, throw those thrash in their place. It's not that hard after all, find a dustbin then put it inside them. Even there no dustbin, why don't just spare a moment of your pocket to be as a dustbin until you find the real one. We are actually cruel creature-being, try to think, what have natural gave us. Food, Place, Cloth and Others. What does gave them, thrash, polluted air, contaminated water, burning forest, extinction of animal habit. Does it fair ?. Think about it.

People always judge a people by their appearance. There was too rare for a people to make a good perception on a people on their first meet. What make a people as a people ?. How to determine them ?. People have their own characteristic. I guess how their have their behavior is depend on the environmental of their living. That was maybe their influences. How does a shemale can turn that way ?. Does he really meant to be that way. Nobody knows. Maybe they have their on reason or maybe it's like my opinion. Okay, let say, i have many friend that are a girl. When i'm asking them, "Which are you gonna chose, appearance or behavior ?" many of them will answer "behavior". But i felt it was a lie. Many of them will chose the vice versa. Appearance first. Sometimes, have you ever met a person that is different outside and inside. For me, i have. I have a friend which is his appearance looks like a bunch of bad guy. Many will say that, this kind of people will neglecting their study and just wanna to have fun in their life. But it wrong, he more smarter than me. I'm kinda envy with this kind of people because when you put your effort more than them but they more excellent than you what do you feel ?.

Okay, i guess i have to sleep, kinda sleepy here.
to be continued...

time..

mase yg berlalu terlalu pantas bagi aku, laju jer..ase cm ad hari yg aku trskip tp pkir blek xde lah pulak..hmm, skrg neyh aku sdg melihat rakan2 ku yg brseronok sdg cuti sem, manakala aku msih ag bwu nk exam..warghh!!!

nex week aku da stat ngn paper2 killer yg tiada gap diantaranya.. so aku xkn heran jikalau dak2 kelas aku ke dewan exam brmate kn emo dan gothic (huhu style abes cm2 msok dewan pekse) .. bila di fikir kn, uni len ksi stady week smngu jer..haa kterunk ngn ad nyer nc yg trlalu bek hati mmberi kami stady week 3 mngu mngikut kiraan cincai tambah tolak smue. klu plajar nerd dpt cmneyh, kompem die kate heaven gler nk dpt 4 flat.. tp tulah, klu ksi aku sbln stdy week kt aku un aku rse x ckop..muahaha,, ini smue kerna angkara malas yer..huhu..kkdg 2 ad gak ttbe lam pale aku trlintas "sal la xde mnusia yg genius sesgt wt msin mase.." trok kn aku..haha..kkdg 2 cm2 aku da motivate dri aku..untuk 5 mnit pertama bole ag, tp ble da mmbe on call, owh aku tertewas..warghh..xpe "stady bia smart.." tp aku neyh x smart mner weyh..tlongg!!

cmner la neh..aku cuak bena nyer.. nk jer stdy x tdo tp sme jer..nti otak aku hang on, ag trok aku rse..bole mngundang format kt otak aku, so bek wt pe yg mmpu jer..aku un xde la mgharapkn pointer gempak2 neyh sbb aku un sdar gak dri aku neyh, xde la "star" mne pown nk score tgi2..bia jelah..tawakal sje..hee =D

konklusi nyer aku akn cube mng offline kn dri untk smntara wk2 supye leyh focus (hp un nk gak ke eh, hmm xperlu kot..hohoho)

s0, to all ma fwen yg sme trikh exam im wishin u a gudluck for the paper, and wish me gudluck 2 kayh..
^.^

Oh, i'm just feeling soRry for myselF..

Well noting much to say actually, just now i realize that life must be go on. I can't be 24/7 emo, eventhough i really hated bout it. I admit this time, that what past just let it pass. It's really a waste if i try to look back again. She will never meant to be with me. So, like everybody said "bunga bukan sekuntum.." . Haha i'm tired of this games, being pretending that i actually already okay but the fact my feeling still don't fade away. I'm just hurting myself. It doesn't mean that i give up, it just thing doesn't work out. We have been gave a brain to use and think, and i must think how to make myself happier instead of hoping that she will back to me and love me again. Such a trash thinking i guess. Like my friend said even we are 'alone', we  can still be happy. It just we need to seek how to be happy again. This time i will move on for sure, no need to be hesitated anymore. I'm sick of keeping my heart hurt and hurt. What do i get ? nothing after all. For a girls, they maybe can have fun now because we the guys gonna support them in the future. For the guys, if we just have fun now and fail on the future who gonna support us? Better start think about my future and what have been i through is a just 'ujian' from HIM. I'm glad after all, because i know this will make me stronger than before. This is just one of the 'ujian'. If i can't solve this thing now how bout the next 'ujian'. I don't want to be such a crap loser. Everybody want to be a champion. hehe.. umm i'll try to post something more freshie and interesting after this, instead of "lovey-dovey" things haha. For all for the reader, thank a lot for reading and give some responded. I really appreciate it. ^.^.


Free tips fella's, don't afraid to try something new ^.^

For her, i got nothing say just don't get yourself hurt again.

Toodles ~

give me a BreaK..

da ujung2 neyh..exam mkin dkat..ltely ney aku sgt rse serabot ngn pale otak aku neyh..aku tataw pe kes die nk jdi cmney ble da ujung2 cmney..tensen lak aku rse..aku sendiri un xtw sebna nye aku serabot ngn pe..cme ble smpai sober aku..bnde yg mnyerabotkn neyh kcik je..cme aku je x reti nk handle cne..arghh pedulik kn bnde2 tuh..it not for future pown.. ^.^ ..lately neyh, perlis telah dlnda dngan bnjir..so aku terpakse pulang ke halaman rumah kerna musibah telah melanda aku ketika bnjir melanda perlis.. penah x korunk kehilangan wallet or purse..?? rse mcm lost kn..?? haa, itulah yg mnimpa aku skg yg da ujung nk exam neyh..haih -.- .. npe la skg bru aku nk kne..byk bnde aku nk kne renew..wallet2 un kne renew..haih.. so untuk smentara neyh, aku warga negara bebas yer..haha =D .. itu satu la kn..tp ble pkir kt atm aku ilang rse merana lak..tetbe ank pnah ksedihan trpcak ke arah hati aku..hiba mlnda..dwet xde..cne nk lpk2..hmm..so mksud nyer aku kne renew ic aku spntas yg mngkin kerna ia main card..huhu.. tp skg ngh weekend..tgu weekdays la g renew..aku nk ucapkn trimas la kpade rkan2 seperjuangan aku yg sudi mghulur kn sen2 mereke kpade aku yg pasrah ini.. trimas2..kerna korunk aku dpt blek uma..sob sob..

haa, msti korunk igt 2 jer kn cobaan yg mlnde aku..blom abes lgie..swktu igin mmbli tket, akk knter itu mnyatakn bahwa bas itu akn stop d bkit jalil.. aku dngan tnpa brfikir pjg trus mghulur nota 50 ringit kpada nya (kaunter bas 2 un kre fames2 gak la bb 2 cye je) ..aku pulang mngemas apa yg patot sblom pkul 10 mlm..stelah smpi disitu, dan2 aku mndpt sit d sblah nadhirah..slah sorunk rkan aku di uniMAP..aku skip chapter2 yg cm x pyah cter kt snie..sesmpai di jln duta, nad tron kt ctu..aku sty bb aku slu nyer psney die akn singgah bkit jlil..nmun aku trlelap sbntar dan aku tgk kiri kanan da kilang2..aku mule terdetik "asl tmpt ney kilang2?? cm kt shh alam jer.." dan sangkaan aku tepat skali.. mmg kt shh alam..huwah aku mule saspen..tp lek lu..aku try mn cool en dri aku..dan mnyangka kan bahwa bas g bkit jalil myb pasney..so aku smbug tdo..stelah smpi pit stop seterusnye dan ia mrupakan pit stop terakhir yg dmnae aku x tw, aku melihat kelihatan aku sorunk je x trun ag..aku mula ragu..aku trun bas dan brtnye " x singah bkit jalil ke cik??" ..pkcik 2 replied " kterunk mmg x singgah dik, n ney stesen last.." the last station was KLANG..wth!! aku x pena dtg snie..seb bek msih mnyebelahi aku..pkcik itu mngatakan bahwa ad bas g tmpt len, cme kne tgu kt ujung tuh..aku un rilek kmbali, nmun krg bes aku yg smpi kul 630 trpkse mnugu 830 untuk bas rapid k.l..skali aku wth!! haih..byk tol dugaan..dlm poket aku yg berbekal kn rm 8.50 mmbwt kn aku mnjadi " ckup ke neyh nak blek uma?? prot lapa neyh..". ouh aku trpkse mbwt plihan ktika itu..aku mmilih un belapa..xpe than kjap smpi uma kte melahap..huhu..itulah kte2 motivasi yg mmbwt kn aku gagah untuk pulng..hoho..tnpe berfikir pjg bgaimana nk mnugu ke 830 pagi,ak trus mmbring kn dri kt krusi mnungu bas area2 ctu ag pown aku mmg x tdo sgt dlm bas td kerna ksejukan..huuuu ~ ..aku terjaga kul 8..aku mls tdo blek slpas itu kerna tkot terlepas..dlm tgu2 nseb bek ad sorunk rkan yg baek hati mnelefon ku..huah trase sket ad tman..huhu..kterunk borak2 smpi bas dtg...skali baya singit..fuh aku trik nfas lege..nmun ad bas ag kne nek g k.l sentral lak..stelah dbwa ronda oleh pokcik bas rapid itu aku smpi di seksyen 2 shh alam..sni mmg tmpt tuka bas..tnye org shh alam, msti tw punyer..hoho

stelah skian lme mnungu pntu bas untk d buka, akhir nya terbukak gak.. lntas aku brtnye "bpe bang tket stu??" ngn lju nyer die jwb 3 igit..aku mse tuh da cm..sng ckp aku skali lgie wth!!! ..aku un baya jela nk smpi uma punyer psal ngn pwot aku da ad band nth dri mne mmg paramore ngn MCR un x dpt fight punyer crowd die..haih..dlm bas tuh borink2 aku un usha2 jelah gdis2 shh alam smbil2 tgk kete2 kt lua tuh..mcm2 ad..haha..pedulikan smue tuh, aku lyn mp3 aku..stelah smpi d k.l sntral..keadaan sprti byse yg smak ngn manusia yg ke sana snie..tp sblom smpi ke k.l sentral aku da kire ciap2 balance yg aku tgal.. smue nye total dlam poket ade 2.50 ringit malaysia..hrap2 lepas..stelah itu aku pegi ke mesin tket bkn ke kaunter kerna ble dwet x ckop aku xkn nmpk suspicious..muahaha.. stelah aku tkn butang kuning kt ctu dan butang 'sehala dewasa' di paparan skrin tertulis 3.30 ringit..aku skali lgi wth!! cmpur ngn bnde2 len..haih mcm2 aku kne..nmun skjap sje aku rse bgitu..idea setan ku mnyerang...hahahaha...aku kmbali wt bnde yg sme mesin tuh cme kali neh butang 'dewasa' di tukar kn kpade 'knak2'..spntas kilat aku mmbwt mke inocen sorunk knak2..dan berjaye..huhu..mcg mule msok kt hanset aku..sorunk gdis yg bwu bngon dri tdur nya..aku hnye tersenyum sahaja..mmblas psanan ringkas itu..aku lnts ke stsen ktepi..mmg rmi org kt ctu even hari pkerja..sdg aku mncri kusi nk duduk, aku trjmpe stu n balun sje tnpe pkir2 da..duk je aku mule sedar keliling aku smue pompuan..haa asl lak neyh, skali aku kt coach tgh..lalu aku bingkas dan belalu 5 tpak dri situ..tgh2 aku lyan mp3 aku, sorunk dak mnyapa aku..owh kwn aku rupe nye..kterunk berbual2 kjp..sbb die pown otw nk pegi ke tempt kerja nya..smpi kt mid die blah..aku pula mnugu smpi stesen ku tiba..stelah smpi kt stu aku jln slow2 utk usha tkot2 ad ktm guard kt ctu..so aku bia en je org len blah dlu..aku jln la slow2..n ad sorunk akk ney aku cm nk tlog agkt bag dye..tp aku tkot ble aku tlong org len pndg ckp aku nk tnjuk trel or bek lak..so i made my decision to wt bodo saja..huhu...smpi kt mesin nk kua tuh, aku pnts2 ccuk tket 2 n lari!!..hahaha...then, tgu jelah org pikup aku..seb bek hanset aku agk bgos even mera2 un dy msih bley than lam 130 jam ag..trel kn..huhu bli la x3..hehe..smpi kt uma aku trus only dan post kt fb pebende aku nk lpskn kt dada neyh..huhu..then aku tros mngeon9 kn dri dan mmbri nsihat kpada rkan2 supaya blek je uma tuuh..
skian itulah cte2 aku dlm mnempuh dugaan..hmm x tw pe lak psney..cme skg neyh aku ngh jiwe kaco..aku konfius dri segi hati dan perasaan aku..pape jelah..

ad stu cite, dulu aku penah trjumpe satu 'bunge' neyh.. pada mule nye aku x brmnat lgsung dgan 'bunge' neyh..nmun stelah aku mngenali ciri2 dan characteristic 'bunge' neyh, aku mule tertrik ngn sifat2 dye ad..tetpi bnge yg aku angap bertuah untuk dimiliki mula mnunjukn duri2 di skeliling nya..di mne aku lgsung x bersedia ngn duri2 tuh..the end of the story, ma hand bleeding a lot..myb aku ney lelaki yg blum ckop untuk memiliki 'bunge' cm dye..aku mule mnyumpah2 bunge tersebut, tp aku cube untuk brfikir waras knape bnde2 ney brlaku..aku tdak boleh mnunding jari kpade stu phak jer..mmg slah aku jgk, aku trase aku x bfikir jaoh akn ape trjadi slaps itu..aku cub nk memaafkn 'bunga' tuh..tp aku susah nk maafkn..lupa 2 mgkin bole..prot kt tgn2 aku, aku sndri x psti suda btol2 sembuh untk brdepan kmbali ngn 'bunga' tuh..masa berlalu, aku rse aku da oke, aku mule mnegur 'bunga' itu..ad respon, aku x kesa, mgkin kli neyh sbgai kwn tp aku akui mmg aku syg dye lgie..cme aku hrus blajar mcmne nk kwal prasaan neyh..tkot duri tu atack ble2 mse je..so i'm must prepared..dlm keadaan skg, aku sebena nya konfius ngn perasaan aku..aku mmg syg dye tp aku xkn sprti dlu ap yg dy da wt dan ats kbodohan aku sndri yg lambat sgt..cme skg aku hnye mmpu mlihat jejaka2 len dtg mghampiri 'bunga' itu..da oleh itu aku akn mnjdi lutsinar bgi nya..kerna dye xkn sdar lgi yg aku sntiasa ad disitu mnugu sbuah hrapan yg mngkin x kn ad dan wujud..aku ckp mcm ney sbb hati 'bunga' itulah telah di curi sseorg..aku cemburu dngn jejaka itu kerna die x mnghrgai hati 'bunga' itu..sbb itulah 'bunga' itu mghiraukn khadiran aku kerna dye hnye mghrap akan jejaka itu kembali memetik die..ye aku akui aku xde kemahiran memetik bunge itu..persoalan nya, aku x pham knape susa sgt aku nk mlihat 'bunga2' laen..knape harus aku mnaruh hrapan pada 'bunga' yg same wlopon 'tgn' aku pena brdarah kerna nya..hmm..knape die curik hati aku!! knape die buang 'hati' aku cm2 jer..murah kn hati aku neyh...ye, mmg hati aku untk dibuang2..mmg ni nseb aku agk nye..knape harus cite aku terbalek ngn kaum2 hawa neyh..npe aku x sperti jejaka2 len..aku x pham!!..aku sgt mghrapkn stu ari nti sseorg tlong slamatkn aku dri keadaan neyh..aku btol2 nk lupe kn 'bunga' tuh..hati aku x sekata ngn minda aku..hati aku sng sgt trluka dri prbuatan die..aku akn brpegang kata2 ini.. " sayang x brmakna memiliki, lepaskn lah, jikalau ia kembali kepada engkau, mkna nya dia mlik dikau.." ini lah kate2 aku sematkn dlm hati aku..supaya aku bole move on kpade life baru dan mmbuka hati aku kepada org len..tp tidak mngapa aku juga mempelajari byk bnde drinya, tetang perkara2 yg aku sendiri x penah taw..biar lah..mmg khidupan sperti itu..

stu perkara aku harapkan, supaya satu ari nti jejaka itu membuka matanya dan hargai lah hati 'bunga' itu..sakit d hati tiada ubat nya berbentuk pil..smue mmerlukan ketabahan diri untuk mngubat nye..kepada nex lover aku, aku juz nk ckp "aku mula penat mncari dikau..tlong la hdir..".. b4 dat im gona fix maself onto a beter man than b4.. wahai 'bunga' hargailah ap yg d skeliling jgn lah trlalu demand.. kerna aku tw ap trjadi ble trlalu demand..hmm aku harap 'bunga' itu bahagia sbb aku pling x ske klu dye brsedih..haih -.- ..tlong la sesorunk wt dye bahagia even aku akn cemburui nya..haha ;p

mgkin itu saja aku ingin kongsi kn..yup ney las post aku pling pjg..n myb pasney xde da kot..huhu
trima kasih kerna mmbaca.. ^.^

Wahai 'bunga' saya juz nk awk taw yg sy still syg awk..tanx for everything
Pergilah kepada die, tak mengapa aku sedar kemampuan ku..jaga diri baik2.. (^.~)


walk away by funeral for a friend..